Change of Heart

By change of heart, I am not referring to the Yu-Gi-Oh card...or maybe I am...who knows..

A sudden realization that a person may have a change of heart and so easily has hit me yesterday. I found out that a friend of mine went from undecided about a major in her future to decided. She had been thinking about going into different  majors throughout this year. First off it was fashion then she switched to business because her mother wouldn't let her major in fashion...and now she wants to be a pharmacist. The correlation between these majors...NONE. They're all quite far apart....on a different branch if one were to place each on a tree. 

I sat around thinking about my choice of career. I too wish to be a pharmacist one day. I've always had this dream, ever since I was in middle school. There are many others who wish to become one as well...so I wondered...am I becoming one for the right reasons? 

My reasons for becoming a pharmacist: 
1. I was inspired by my sister's friend, who is a pharmacist and has told me great things about her job. 
2. A few of the great things I've heard from this friend of my sister's are that I'll be able to meet many people. 
3. Another would be I'd know many diseases and cures for it. 
4. I will be STANDING. I like to stand, sitting makes me feel lazy. Plus I do it in school so much I NEED to stand. 
5. I'll make a good amount of money and with this I will be able to provide for my family. 
6. I can help people. 
7. I'll be almost like a doctor. Right?

I had a dream of being many things when I was younger...but the biggest one was doctor. It's unfortunate that my fear of blood prevents me from doing many things in the medicine field..I know that I can be a specialty doctor and focus on ONE body part. But...I can't choose A body part. That's so BORING! I'd get sick of looking at the same thing over and over and over and over again. 

I really want to help people. I truly honestly do. I want to help the less fortunate, those who are unable to obtain the right treatment they need. Money is a major issue for some people and I know there are people who, if they do not have any help from the government (medicaid, medicare, etc.), are unable to go to the doctors. I feel horrible for that and I wish to go from place to place helping others. Perhaps I'd be a traveling doctor, or something like that. Of course I wouldn't be able to gain much money unless I open a clinic or work in a hospital. So I'd probably be a "traveling doctor" on particular days. Wouldn't that be nice? *sigh* It feels like I'd inch more towards that...but my last reason for being a pharmacist is...a crucial one. 

Honestly, the last reason is...time. It takes a long time to become a doctor and I don't mind! But it's time...time is so short....I have to be able to help take care of my family and it has to be a job that makes a good deal of money. To become a doctor would take a little longer than a pharmacist and that's what made my decision for me. I'll be working really hard to achieve my goal....becoming a pharmacist... 

This is a really long post...it's interesting. Why do I write my thoughts out on here? I don't really want people to read this..they'll judge me for what I write. I'd show this to friends but as I said, they'd judge me for what I write. They'd read this and I'll feel exposed. That's why I haven't really given my link to anyone yet..

I hope that whoever reads my posts though....doesn't feel like it was a waste of their time. 

But you see my issue with this is...I guess I'm scared of change. It's so easy to change your heart I see. What if I go through life changing from career to career? It sounds so exhausting. I dunno..it's a toss between pharmacist and doctor. I never gave being a doctor much thought because it seems so ...long. You go through all that and then you have to build a clientele. That is not easy. There are many many doctors. Where will you work? Who will come to you? Pediatrician...hmmm.... 

Change of hearts...if people can change their minds so easily when it comes to their future. What about a change of heart towards your loved one? The heart can be so evil. It changes feelings so quickly. Any marriage or relationship that lasts without falling into the heart's trap is amazing. I truly hope it doesn't happen to anyone I know.